Do we really need one-on-ones?
Dongyoung Kim, CPO
Yes, because some conversations are hard to have in team meetings or chat. Leaders usually hesitate for three reasons: no time, a sense that team members won't want them, and doubt about doing them well. Here are answers to the questions that come up under each.
Leaders usually hesitate for three reasons
Suggest starting one-on-ones and leaders raise all kinds of worries. Listen closely and most of them fall into one of three groups: time, how team members will react, and the leader's own confidence. The worries are natural. What matters is finding a small way to start so they do not hold you back.
| Kind of worry | What leaders say | What to try first |
|---|---|---|
| Time | We already have lots of meetings. I have too many people. | Work out the actual time from team size and cadence. |
| Team member reaction | My team will find it stressful. If we keep notes, they won't be candid. | Keep the first few short and agree up front on how notes are used. |
| Leader confidence | I don't know their work well. There is nothing I can offer. | Ask about the situation instead of giving answers, and only promise what you can keep. |
The worry about time
"We already have lots of meetings. Do we need one-on-ones too?"
Team meetings cover information everyone needs and decisions you make together. Whether one person's workload is manageable, who they find hard to work with, and what they want to do next are hard to raise in front of others. That is why one-on-ones should stay even if you cut meetings. Hearing individual circumstances in one-on-ones can even make team meetings shorter.
"I have too many people to find the time."
If it just feels like a lot, do the arithmetic. With eight team members and 30 minutes every two weeks, that is two hours a week on average. Gallup estimated that managers account for at least 70% of the variance in employee engagement scores across business units (Gallup, 2015). It is an estimate based on correlation, but it makes clear that conversations with team members are among the higher-impact uses of a leader's time.
8
team members
30 min
per meeting
2 weeks
cadence
120 min/wk
about 2 hours a week
If time is still short, adjust the cadence: stretch it to every three or four weeks with people who know their work well, and spend more time with new joiners. Guidelines for setting cadence are in how to run a one-on-one.
The worry that team members won't want them
"My team will find it stressful."
Team members usually feel pressure because they do not know what to say or because it feels like being evaluated. Keep the first few to 20 or 30 minutes and share some example topics beforehand, and the pressure eases. When the date is set in advance, team members also have time to think about what they want to raise. This is also why Ben Horowitz saw the one-on-one as a meeting for the employee rather than the manager (a16z, 2012).
"If we keep notes, they won't be candid."
Team members hold back when they do not know where notes will go. In the first one-on-one, settle and share who can see the notes, whether they are used in reviews, and whether the team member can correct them. The rules must follow your organization's evaluation policy. Once team members see notes being used as evidence of their contributions, they tend to want to record more. How notes relate to reviews is covered in How is a one-on-one different from a performance review?.
The worry about doing it well
"I don't know their work in depth."
The leader does not need to have the answers in a one-on-one. The less you know the details, the more useful questions about the situation become. Questions like "If this slips, who feels it first?" or "Which part are you least sure about right now?" need no specialist knowledge and help the team member sort out their own thinking. When technical advice is needed, connecting them with someone who can help is part of the leader's job too.
"I have no say over pay or promotion."
You do not need to promise rewards in a one-on-one, and you should not. Make promises you can keep instead, promises about the process, such as "I'll find out and get back to you before our next one-on-one" or "I'll write up your role in this project in detail for the review." As small promises are kept, team members trust the leader and bring up more.
"Seniors don't seem to need one-on-ones."
If seniors find one-on-ones dull, it is usually because the meetings centered on checking status. Cover broader topics with them, such as their decision scope, the team's direction, and the role they want next, and the conversation changes character. See How do you run one-on-ones with senior employees? for details.
What do you lose if you don't hold them?
Even after answering these worries, you may still want to put one-on-ones off. If so, consider what you lose without them. There is no fixed result, but according to Gallup, 51% of employees who left voluntarily said that in the three months before they left, neither their manager nor any other leader spoke with them about their job satisfaction or their future with the organization (Gallup, 2019). Without regular one-to-one conversations, there is simply no place to raise these topics.
If you decide to start, the next step is introducing one-on-ones to your team. What to say is in How do you introduce one-on-ones to your team?, and the order for the first meeting is in how to run a one-on-one.
Frequently Asked Questions
- Q.Can't we just hold more team meetings instead?
- Team meetings suit sharing information everyone needs, but they are a poor fit for one person's circumstances, such as workload, collaboration problems, or career. The two do different jobs, so it is better to run both.
- Q.What if a team member doesn't want one-on-ones?
- Start by hearing why. It is often not knowing what to say or feeling evaluated. Keep the meetings short, share example topics in advance, and after a few, agree together on how to continue.
- Q.What happens if we don't hold one-on-ones?
- No fixed outcome can be stated. But Gallup found that 51% of employees who left voluntarily had no conversation about their job satisfaction or future in the three months before leaving. Losing a regular place for those conversations is the biggest difference.
ORBLIT
How Orblit helps
To make it easier to put this article into practice, Orblit helps in these ways.
01"We have no time"
Record the conversation and AI converts it to text and organizes key questions and answers, a detailed summary, and action items. Leaders do not have to take notes, and an AI prep chatbot helps with preparation.
02"My team finds it stressful"
Team members write their own prep before the meeting and edit the shared meeting note with the leader, so the conversation can be built around the team member.
03"I worry about the notes"
A shared note that leader and team member edit together, and role-based access control, manage who can see what.
04"I don't know their work"
Orblit suggests tailored questions from the team member's prep notes and one-on-one history, so you can start the conversation without being a domain expert.
05If you need to convince the organization
The meeting dashboard shows one-on-one progress and team member status across the organization, and Education and the Momentum Program help leaders and team members understand the reasons together.
Sources
- Managers Account for 70% of Variance in Employee Engagement · Gallup (Randall Beck, Jim Harter) · 2015-04-21
- This Fixable Problem Costs U.S. Businesses $1 Trillion · Gallup (Shane McFeely, Ben Wigert) · 2019-03-13
- One on One · Andreessen Horowitz (Ben Horowitz) · 2012-08-30